Driven completely insane" she wrote
by Dimitrix Spamidonia
Summary: Funny , read it , wrote it for school , R&R, Rated MIACI for "Much Insanity and Craziness Involved"


From: "Rick Havard" rickhavard@mindspring.com  
To: "Rick Havard" rickhavard@mindspring.com  
Subject: Antonio Vivaldi.doc  
Date: Tuesday, January 23, 2001 8:40 PM  
  
This was written for a project in music class.  
Disclaimer- Antonio Vivaldi isn't mine. The people playing the characters belong to themselves. Every thing else is mine. Except Technicolor. Or the Internet.   
  
This one is much better than the one I wrote in 15 minuets. Lots of changes in character. It'll do.   
I think I should write scripts when I grow up. What do you think? Well, don't just sit there, read the dumb script already, GOSH!   
  
Hey, I told you to read the script, were you not listening, or are you stalling or what?  
(If you're afraid of the script I can honestly tell you it won't bite, although you could get a nasty paper cut, if you do get a serious or even a minor paper cut, PLEASE don't sue me because I don't have any money, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, don't sue me!)  
Cast:  
Claire - Angela Darling, Insane Lady  
Rachel - Antonio Vivaldi, violinist and composer   
Katie - Patricia Paprika Prittipants, Reporter for the Nosy-Nosed Films Reporter Agency  
Courtney - Demitrix (Demi for short)(I love that name! Demetrix is a cool name.) Porter, Personal Assistant to Miss Sophie  
Bree - Miss Sophie -Trinity Dipstick (Trinity, another cool name), Big Time Producer   
(Thingies in brackets ([these]) are actions.)  
  
-Bree's Part-MS  
-Katie's Part-PP  
-Claire's Part-AD  
-Rachel's Part-AV  
-Courtney's Part--DP  
  
Opening- AV is sitting with a blanket on her lap napping, a violin is leaned against the wall (made of paper) enter PP, MS, and DP.  
  
PP- Hello Mr. Vivaldi! [AV wakes up with a start] I'm Patricia Paprika Prittipants from the Nosy-Nosed Films Reporter Agency here to interview you on our movie that we're making on you. " Il Prete'Rosse", the red priest. IN TECHNICOLOR  
  
AV- Who said you could come in here and interrupt my nappy-time? I'm calling security!   
  
MS- You invited us, don't you remember? You said that we could come in today and ask you a few questions for our film. Right girls? [Glare at them so they nod vigorously]  
  
  
AV- I did? Oh, I don't remember doing that.   
  
DP- That's because we didn't really a- [PP and MS put hands over her mouth just in time]  
  
AV- What?  
  
PP & MS - [innocently] Nothing...  
AV- Well, are you going to ask me those questions or not?  
PP- I'll start now [take deep breath, bring out notepad]  
Were you born on March 4th, 1678? Where? Did you write, " The Harmonic Inspiration" in 1711? How about writing "The Four Seasons" 1725,"The hunt " 1725, "Storm at Sea"1725, or "Pleasure" in 1725? Well?  
AV-Well, let's see, Yes, Venice, Yes to the rest too.  
DP- So let me get this straight; you were born in Venice, Italy in 1678,   
Composed " The Harmonic Inspiration" in 1711, and, You   
Wrote " The Four Seasons", " Storm at Sea" and "Pleasure" in 1725?  
AV-Yup.  
[Enter AD]  
AD- Hello, my name is Angela Darling and when I grow up I want to be a 12 foot, purple, singing carrot! [Think about it] Or maybe a starfish!  
MS- What is she doing here? Who is she?   
ALL (except MS & AD) I don't know!  
AD- I like Spam, and my mommy was a RadioactiveMOOcow.  
MS-Demetrix, get her out of here.  
DP- [salute] Okie dokie smokie! [To AD] Come on let's go get some French-Friend  
Watermelon at Al's Pickle Barn.  
AD-Okay ... MOO! MOO! MOO! I'm am hungie MOOcow so lets so let's go. High ho starfish! [AD run off stage DP run after her]  
PP & MS at the same time- Okaaaay. [Look at each other]  
PP- Mr. Vivaldi, I have just a few more questions.  
AV- Good, you weirdoes are making be tired.  
PP- Maybe you should eat more sugar, like the rest of us, anyway, Mr. Vivaldi; you are a violinist and composer, correct? You are also a priest? Do some scholars think you trained against your will? Did you spend most of your adult life teaching the girl's chorus at Ospedale Della Pietain, Venice Italy, which was an orphanage for girls? You also conducted and taught violin there, right? You lived during the Baroque period, 16 to 17 hundred, where music was grand and fancy? You composed in the Baroque style? Besides teaching, did you also write operas, symphonies, and concertos for string and woodwind instruments? Is " The Four Seasons" your most famous work? Did you inspire Bach? What is today's date? Crunchy or smooth peanut butter?  
  
AV- Um... yes to all of them, July 28th, 1741 and smooth please.  
  
  
  
  
[Enter AD & DP]  
  
AD- Do you expect us to believe that you are a violinist and composer? You are also a priest. Some scholars think you trained against your will. You spent most of your adult life teaching the girl's chorus at Ospedale Della Pietain, Venice Italy, which was an orphanage for girls. You also conducted and taught violin there. You lived during the Baroque period, 16 to 17 hundred, where music was grand and fancy. You composed in the Baroque style. Besides teaching, you also wrote operas, symphonies, and concertos for string and woodwind instruments. " The Four Seasons" is your most famous work. You inspired Bach. You like smooth peanut butter.  
  
DP- [accusingly] YEAH!  
AV- Yes, well I mean it's all true.  
AD- [think] Okay.  
DP- Hey, I just realized something, it's the 1740's and we're making a movie? In color? Moving pictures aren't going to be invented for another 180 years. I don't even know if we have still pictures. So how come we're trying to do a movie in Technicolor? We aren't even supposed to know this stuff exists!  
PP- Ya know Sophie, the kid has a point there, how do we know all this.  
MS-Because the author is insane.   
PP- I'll believe that.  
AV- You people are going to kill me, and I'm not exaggerating. [Fall over dead]  
AD- I DIDN'T DO IT!! [Run offstage quickly]  
MS- I don't think I want to do this movie anymore. Or at least not on Vivaldi.  
PP and DP together - You don't?  
MS- Nope I want to do Shakespeare. Come on girls. Let's go book a flight to London.  
DP- But Sophie, none of us know anything about Shakespeare.  
MS- Oh, That's Okay, I'll look something up on the Internet when I get home.  
AV- [undie for a second, shake fist in the air while yelling] INSANE YOU'RE ALL INSANE!! [Die again]   
  
THE END [all come out and bow]  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
